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Like many girls I know, dating apps have flitted in and out of my life rather like periods, the gym and my interest in Kylie Jenner.

As a single girl it seems like once a month, without fail, I end up curled up on my sofa in front of a random episode of KUWTK swiping incessantly usually left. However before long my need for some form of snack inevitably distracts me from my phone before I even begin to respond to Jamie, I then reorganised my profile pictures like a visual dating CV. I wanted to let my potential baes know that whilst I can obvs look amazing, I can also conduct a topographic archaeological survey like a pro.

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I started trying out a winky face to add playfulness to anything I was saying. In hindsight I think this was slightly confusing for the potential baes and led to some ghosting they were obviously too overwhelmed by my rampant playfulness. An express route to a date, no small talk required.

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